why i don't get awards in the SCA
Dec. 19th, 2012 08:48 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
boogieshoesso, something that gelled for me last weekend is truth behind why i don't get awards in the
SCA.
i've had an on-going internal tug-of-war over this for some time, based on the fact
that i'd love to be recognized for things that i've done, and at the same time, i kind of
resent having to *work* for it, and i think the reason it took me so long to realize *that*
is because i'm mature enough that i really don't want to be that kind of petty. i know darn
well you don't get recognized for sitting on your butt and socializing, so i think the past
few years i've spent going over some of my internal issues was my subconcious trying to keep
my super-concious from realizing just where part of my tangle of feelings was coming from.
but let me back up a bit. the reason i don't get arts&crafts awards - much less combat
awards - is that i completely lack any kind of focus when it comes to SCA activities. as we
were discussing this weekend with Mistress Brigitte, if you don't actually *finish*
something - and submit it - usually, people have no idea what you're doing. boy, this makes
sense. ;) i joked that i was sure i could find documentation for half-finished pieces, but
seriously, that doesn't fly.
now, i'm kind of a magpie when it comes to my hobbies. and usually, i'm just fine with
that. i think what i'm running up against is my that i'm watching my SCA friends advance in
the Society, and win recognition for their skills, and like a child, i want that for myself.
except that since I consider the SCA 1) primarily a wonderful *hobby* and 2) a social
circle, i don't really want to do anything that feels too much like *work* for that
recognition. 'Work' you see, has a solid definition of 'not always fun', while 'hobby' has
a solid definition of 'having fun while doing it'.
this isn't, of course, a definition that really covers all the nuances of 'work' and 'hobby'
and 'fun'. it *is* a definition that keeps me in a state of passive-aggressive paralysis,
preventing me from producing whatever it is.
i also know it's a false dichotomy - i *know* from my few forays into writing fanfiction
that it's a lot of fun as *well* as a lot of work. i'm not sure why i've never applied this
thinking to SCA stuff, maybe because i'd been having so much fun socializing i forgot the
other part of it.
i'm not sure where this road of thinking is going to lead in my SCA activities. i'm not
going to quit or do anything drastic like that - i love the SCA, and i love the people, and
i do get the awards i deserve: service awards for holding Heraldry offices, washing dishes,
doing the troll table, etc. what i mean is, i'm not sure how or if i'm going to focus my
SCA energies. it may be that i decide i'm happy to be a hobby magpie and that my best
chance of getting awards is to get AoAs from all the kingdoms. which means i'll have to
co-ordinate with someone from Loch Ach (Australia), because i am totally never going camping
in the land of vicious drop bears.
i think the first few steps will be to list all the things i'm *interested* in doing in the
SCA, and then pick one to focus on, and see if i can actually start finishing/ practicing in
that area. it might never happen, but i think my primary SCA goal this year will be to
learn to focus.
things i've been interested in doing SCA-wise:
1) Calligraphy
2) Research Heraldry
3) embroidery/ tapestry work
4) rapier/fencing/schlager
5) heavy combat
6) archery and combat archery
7) building trebuchets and other siege engines, both replicas and SCA-combat
8) having dedicated dye gardens, herbal/ medication gardens
9) leather work, in terms of decorating same
10) horse *barding*, not necessarily doing a lot of things with horses themselves (long
story)
11) Some variation of belly dancing - i'm thinking Turkey variations right now, to
compliment Mistress Isolde's Egyptian? and Lady Amber's Bahrain dancing
12) period camping with modern 'amenities'
13) Woodworking, in terms of furniture making
14) Woodworking, in terms of carving.
i'm sure i'll remember or find some more things to be interested in. but i wanted a list to
focus my thoughts, first, so i can keep things muddling around in the back of my head.
hopefully, they'll gell a bit more as time goes on.
so, those who know me, does this analysis sound like it's from out of left field? or a logical extension of my brain? i'm already having more thinky thoughts on it, and wishing i knew how to produce Venn-Diagram graphics on lj. :-p
-boogieshoes, the thinky horse
SCA.
i've had an on-going internal tug-of-war over this for some time, based on the fact
that i'd love to be recognized for things that i've done, and at the same time, i kind of
resent having to *work* for it, and i think the reason it took me so long to realize *that*
is because i'm mature enough that i really don't want to be that kind of petty. i know darn
well you don't get recognized for sitting on your butt and socializing, so i think the past
few years i've spent going over some of my internal issues was my subconcious trying to keep
my super-concious from realizing just where part of my tangle of feelings was coming from.
but let me back up a bit. the reason i don't get arts&crafts awards - much less combat
awards - is that i completely lack any kind of focus when it comes to SCA activities. as we
were discussing this weekend with Mistress Brigitte, if you don't actually *finish*
something - and submit it - usually, people have no idea what you're doing. boy, this makes
sense. ;) i joked that i was sure i could find documentation for half-finished pieces, but
seriously, that doesn't fly.
now, i'm kind of a magpie when it comes to my hobbies. and usually, i'm just fine with
that. i think what i'm running up against is my that i'm watching my SCA friends advance in
the Society, and win recognition for their skills, and like a child, i want that for myself.
except that since I consider the SCA 1) primarily a wonderful *hobby* and 2) a social
circle, i don't really want to do anything that feels too much like *work* for that
recognition. 'Work' you see, has a solid definition of 'not always fun', while 'hobby' has
a solid definition of 'having fun while doing it'.
this isn't, of course, a definition that really covers all the nuances of 'work' and 'hobby'
and 'fun'. it *is* a definition that keeps me in a state of passive-aggressive paralysis,
preventing me from producing whatever it is.
i also know it's a false dichotomy - i *know* from my few forays into writing fanfiction
that it's a lot of fun as *well* as a lot of work. i'm not sure why i've never applied this
thinking to SCA stuff, maybe because i'd been having so much fun socializing i forgot the
other part of it.
i'm not sure where this road of thinking is going to lead in my SCA activities. i'm not
going to quit or do anything drastic like that - i love the SCA, and i love the people, and
i do get the awards i deserve: service awards for holding Heraldry offices, washing dishes,
doing the troll table, etc. what i mean is, i'm not sure how or if i'm going to focus my
SCA energies. it may be that i decide i'm happy to be a hobby magpie and that my best
chance of getting awards is to get AoAs from all the kingdoms. which means i'll have to
co-ordinate with someone from Loch Ach (Australia), because i am totally never going camping
in the land of vicious drop bears.
i think the first few steps will be to list all the things i'm *interested* in doing in the
SCA, and then pick one to focus on, and see if i can actually start finishing/ practicing in
that area. it might never happen, but i think my primary SCA goal this year will be to
learn to focus.
things i've been interested in doing SCA-wise:
1) Calligraphy
2) Research Heraldry
3) embroidery/ tapestry work
4) rapier/fencing/schlager
5) heavy combat
6) archery and combat archery
7) building trebuchets and other siege engines, both replicas and SCA-combat
8) having dedicated dye gardens, herbal/ medication gardens
9) leather work, in terms of decorating same
10) horse *barding*, not necessarily doing a lot of things with horses themselves (long
story)
11) Some variation of belly dancing - i'm thinking Turkey variations right now, to
compliment Mistress Isolde's Egyptian? and Lady Amber's Bahrain dancing
12) period camping with modern 'amenities'
13) Woodworking, in terms of furniture making
14) Woodworking, in terms of carving.
i'm sure i'll remember or find some more things to be interested in. but i wanted a list to
focus my thoughts, first, so i can keep things muddling around in the back of my head.
hopefully, they'll gell a bit more as time goes on.
so, those who know me, does this analysis sound like it's from out of left field? or a logical extension of my brain? i'm already having more thinky thoughts on it, and wishing i knew how to produce Venn-Diagram graphics on lj. :-p
-boogieshoes, the thinky horse
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no subject
Date: 2012-12-20 09:48 am (UTC)However, what your post brings to mind is the song I listened to about the 4th Pennsic War. heehee Sung by Michael Longcor.
no subject
Date: 2012-12-21 11:20 pm (UTC)-bs
no subject
Date: 2012-12-21 11:28 pm (UTC)