boogieshoes | Mobile Weather Report courtesy of Robin Williams...

Hey, uh, hi, can you help me, what's your name?

"My name's Rose E. Roosevelt."

Rose, what town are you stationed in?

"I'm stationed in Bum-fuck, Alabamy."

Well, thank you, Rose. What's the weather like out there?

"It's cold. Damn cold! Real cold! Coldest things is my shorts. Things are freezing off in
there. I done froze my balls clean off!"

Rose, I, uh, I thought you were a girl?

"How the hell do you think I got that way?!"

Well, can you tell me what it feels like?

"Fool, it's cold! I told you again! Were you born - on Pluto? It's damn cold! I saw... It's so
damn cold, I saw Eskimos, froze so solid their heads burst from the inside out. It's that
cold! Do you know what I'm talking about?"

What do you think it's going to be like tonight?

"It's gonna be cold and nasty! That's nice if you're snuggled in front of a fireplace with a
lady, but it ain't no good if you're in Southern 'Bama!"

Thank you, Rosie. Here's a song coming your way right now. "Walkin' Round in Women's Underwear" by Martha and
the Vandellas. Yes! You know what I mean!"

-bs, shivering